Monday, 10 October 2016

In a world where you can be anything... be kind

Oh look Maddie hasn’t blogged for a while…yet again! So here it is a big apology for being such a slack blogger.

As always, I find myself consumed with the thoughts of blogging again, and today even more so. Today is National Mental Health Day and it hits me pretty close to home. It is time for us to end the illogical and outdated stigma that is attached to feeling depressed or anxious, it’s time that we understand that mental health is equally as important as our physical health.

I wanted to share my story with you to show that mental health is nothing to be embarrassed about, so if you are suffering don’t be ashamed. Or, if you know someone going through a tough time maybe this will help you understand.

So, you know the feeling… increased heart rate, feeling overwhelmed, can’t think clearly, palms sweaty, knees weak, mums spaghetti… sorry, I lost my train of thought there.

Anyway, that awful feeling is anxiety, and we can all feel it sometimes. It could be a simple dread of work the next day, that nerve wracking feeling for a job interview or the fear of medical tests. Whatever it may be we’ve all experienced it at some point. Well here is the sh*t part, it can affect some of us worse than others. And unluckily for me I am in the bracket of anxious wreck! I went from being the life and sole of the party, the crazy and confident one to quite frankly the complete opposite, what felt like overnight. 

At random moments, I will get this building fear that something isn’t right. Nine times out of ten everything is perfectly fine, but once that anxious thought pops in to my head, my mind can’t seem to comprehend that everything will be ok. The anxiety can get so bad that at my worst getting myself out of bed and to the shop became a challenge. My mind constantly switches back and forth, all whilst I am trying my hardest to convince myself that everything is and will be ok. It is a constant battle, that right now, I finally seem to be winning.

Now, that’s the thing with mental health, you CAN’T see it. To the outsider looking in everything is fine, but inside that little head of yours that couldn’t be further from the truth. So here comes that horrible stigma that is attached, the word crazy that haunts us. Do you think we need others to tells us that we are acting crazy? We are already aware of this, and hearing it constantly from others will only fuel our worries. Our mind is turning on itself and we don’t need you to turn on us too, we don’t mean to push you away. It’s our worries and our fears running away from us.
So, for those of you who don’t suffer with anxiety, or any kind of mental health then this is what we ask from you.

Understand – understand that this is not what we want, we don’t want these horrible, worrying, sad thoughts. We hate it more than you do!
Don’t judge – if you see someone struggling, worrying or having a panic attack. Don’t judge, just be there, be patient and most of all be kind.
Listen – sometimes there are times we just need you to hold us, sit with us and not leave us. This is not us being needy. There will also be times we need to be alone and don’t want anyone around. This is not us pushing you away. We don’t expect you to bow to our every request but listen to what we want and act accordingly, the littlest things can really help.

For those of you suffering right now please know you are not alone. With help and good people around you, trust me, things can get a lot better. And, if someone you love is suffering remember this won’t last forever but right now they need you. 


Monday, 1 February 2016

Date Day

So for today's blog post you need to say hello to Lloyd, my "better" half. Monday blues are well and truly kicking in after our date weekend, so I'm spending the morning looking at photos to cheer me up and thought I would share our weekend with you.

So this weekend we had lots of little dates planned, starting with a trip up the Spinnaker tower, one of my home towns famous landmarks, it literally overlooks the whole of Portsmouth and on a clear day the views are beautiful!

Jacket - Missguided / Top - Boohoo / Jeans - Topshop / Hat - Topshop / Trainers - Schuh / Bag - River Island

Recently I've really enjoyed a more casual relaxed clothing look. Trainers are now a firm part of my wardrobe and I can't believe I didn't introduce them sooner. I love the simplicity of  these Adidas superstar trainers - and thanks to Instagram I now want these in every possible colour combination out there. 

This Boohoo top is a new addition to my wardrobe and I love how versatile it is - it can be worn as a long split side top, but for this outfit I tied it to the side and love how it looks, finishing off the perfect day time date look!

Now say hello to bae! I got Lloyd involved in photos this weekend cos I love his look!! We were both surprisingly impressed with Boohoo's affordable yet stylish men's range.

Jacket - Boohoo / Top - Boohoo / Jeans - Topman / Trainers - Footlocker 

So that was part one of our date day, there will be more pictures on the blog as the week goes by, and who knows Lloyd might make another appearance.

Maddie xxx

Wednesday, 6 January 2016

Hello 2016!!

Hello 2016! Yes, I'm a couple of days late but Happy New Year to you lovely lot!!! 2015 has been a bit of a crazy up and down year, a hell of a lot has happened; I got a boyfriend, I got my very own house, I took on more responsibility at work, and whilst all these things are amazing and I'm forever grateful I lost myself towards the end of the year and needed some serious time out. I'm still coming through it now, but I'm feeling a lot more positive. Now I'm never usually one to set goals, I kind of just go with what I want at the time and then hope that somehow everything will fall in to place, but seeing as I want to get my life back on track I think this year I will set myself some goals to make sure I stay on track.

Work out – I'm pretty sure this is everyone’s new year’s resolution right!? But I am determined to stick to it this time. I joined the gym at the end of last year and got myself some gym gear and I'm ready to go. Getting in shape is a bonus, but exercise really helps me clear my mind and stay positive!

Work more on my blog – blogging is a hobby that I really do enjoy, but life commitments meant that this was the one thing I could sacrifice, I always had the mind frame that my blog could wait and before I knew it months had been before I had posted. I'm determined to work on my blog and better my photography in 2016.

Save Money – I'm not the worst with money, but I am by no means the best. I'm never one to say no to that meal out or those after work drinks, and before I know it it’s a few days before pay day and I have nothing saved. Me and the boyfriend have a few holidays booked and we also have lots of plans for the house which I'm determined to make happen in 2016. Turning down those unneeded dinners out and the new dress will sure as hell be worth it in the long run!!

Be more organised – the one thing that drives my boyfriend insane (probably not the only thing) is my lack of organisational skills – when it comes to planning trips and days out I am brilliant, but organisation around the house I sure as hell lack at it. So as a promise to Lloyd I will become more organised!!!

Fill out my happiness jar – I came back to work this Monday feeling with a major case of the back to work blues to find a happiness jar on my desk. The most lovely thoughtful present from a special colleague – everyday of 2016 I will put something in the jar that has made me happy, however small it may be, to remind myself that life aint all that bad!!

I'm already feeling more positive for the year ahead and determined to make this a year full of memories and progression!! What are your goals for 2016?